Fanfiction: Little Women
I twist the ring on my finger nervously. A new ring,a sophisticated wedding ring. Not the ring she gave me when we were kids. I can feel its unfamiliar edges, encircling my finger a bit too tight, squeezing my heart.
I continue
ascending the rickety spiral stairs which I’ve bounded excitedly up so many
times before. She, always in the front, me, right at her heels. “I would have
followed you anywhere and everywhere”, a melancholy thought, weighing down
every step and something inside me. I shrug it off, “This is right, this is
what I want. I am happy now”, I said to myself absent-mindedly and put on a
bright smile.
When I
reach the attic, it is more empty than usual. The trace of notes and scripts
that used to be strewn everywhere on the floor has been covered up by a thin
film of dust. I can see a crumpled form
covered under a blanket, sleeping on the worn-out couch by the attic window. I
know it’s her, and with a pang, I realise how much I’ve missed her. I’m
nervous, what if my heart starts bleeding again. I walk slowly to the wooden
chair next to her, I don’t want to wake her up but I’m afraid she might be able
to hear my deafening heartbeat, so I call her name softly, “Jo”. Her name
tastes bitter on my mouth, reminding me of the wine I drank to drown her out from my mind, but also the
sweetness which lingered on my lips long after.
She stirs and
her hair tumbles out softly, time slows down as her eyes flutter open, and I
drown in love again. I can feel the ring she gave me. Mockingly cool against
the skin on my chest. My heart is beating loudly threatening to break, I’m
trying hard to remember the normal pace of breathing. Everytime the waves of my
beating heart touches the ring, it sends a searing pain, a reminder of how she
was never mine and never will.
Comments
Post a Comment