Movie Review: Marriage Story

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A love story about divorce. Some scenes were very hard for me to watch or understand. I wanted to yell and judge both of them but the single and self-consciously naive me would shush me. The divorce in this movie is certainly complex, or are all divorces this way? I thought it was just a final showdown for two people who hate each other leaving a mess for the children. I did not expect divorce could be a narrative of romance.

Charlie and Nicole clearly love each other very much. I really do blame the lawyers. I really hated the lawyers. They keep pushing them to hate each other and assume the worst of the other. They 'advise' them to make deadly strikes when they say they don't want to. I hated Nicole at some point. Why does she have to get a lawyer? They decided to end their marriage without one and nothing changed that such a need arose. The court room scene was the hardest thing for me to watch. They clearly feel embarassed and guilty to put each other through that. Again, the lawyers' fault. 

I think it's very hard to judge the ending of the movie because we did not get the details of how their relationship was when it was good, how and when did it turn bad. We have nothing to compare the ending to and how they have changed as a person apart from each other.

I think if they have read the notes they have written about why they loved each other, the ending might have been different. When Charlie accidentally read Nicole's note at the end, I could feel my heart breaking. I think they realise too that things would have turned out differently if they just talked to each other. I don't think Charlie is a bad guy or selfish. I feel their whole divorce is based on misunderstanding due to lack of communication, an aftermath of explosion caused by bottled-up emotions. 

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But then again, who am I to talk. I don't even know how relationship works and I'm an expert in bottling up emotions till I convince myself people don't care about me. Nevertheless, I think the lessons gleaned from this movie is valuable. Here's the list:

1)Divorce is easier when you hate each other.

2)Always communicate. There are a lot of things people wouldn't know if you don't tell them. Stop assuming.

3)Marriage is difficult. Even the Obamas needed marriage counselling so don't feel ashamed if it's not perfect, perfect marriage doesn't exist. 

4)Don't give up on your dreams in the name of love, it's unfair to blame your regrets on others who didn't force you to make that choice.

5)Always remember, marriage is not the destination of relationships, it's a new challenge.

There's a line that Charlie said in the movie that I cannot forget, 

'You and I both know you chose this life. You wanted it until you didn't'. 

I'm not saying Charlie is perfect, but we all can agree that the main reason of the divorce is not because Charlie cheated. I really do think Charlie is right with that line. He did not change and she did not change, but somehow the life they had together wasn't enough for Nicole anymore. To be honest, I can understand and I don't think Nicole is wrong either. It's just one of those things that you can't explain but it just doesn't feel right, at least not anymore. If that is so, that one of them have fallen out of love and didn't even want to try anymore, then I take back what I said above, nothing could have saved their marriage.

I would also like to mention that Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson are amazing!! How could they cry like that? They conveyed the emotions so perfectly that I got really sad for them. I had to remind myself that they were just acting. I am a girl and I'm all about girl power, but I really think Nicole has a lot of self-discovery to do, she is very confused about what she wants, reminds me a lot about myself. I really liked Charlie, I think he is flawed but I could see that he was really trying and not an asshole at all. Adam Driver was so attractive for reasons I can't explain and maybe that's why I'm so biased, might have been different if the actor was someone gross. 

There's something about men crossing their legs that I find attractive. And that hair.

To wrap up my thoughts, love and emotions are so complex, please stay away from me, I hurt my own feelings well enough.