My Fear Of Checking Emails

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(Pinterest)
This is me, scrolling through my emails from one month ago


 I'm scared of checking my emails. There's no other way to put it. 


I'm not lazy to do it, I know it's fear. And an absurd one. Doesn't mean it's anything less scary. Just because you tell yourself ghosts don't exist, doesn't mean you don't get scared when you're alone at night and you hear someone crying (Is it just me again?). Sometimes the unexplainable fear is what gets people killed. 


I find myself holding my breath everytime I wait for the email page to load. Everytime I see emails from my college, I want to run and hide away in another country. Even before reading it. And most of the time, it's just an email telling me what other stupid event they have that month.


Emails give me anxiety. Even the friendly ones from Big Bad Wolf telling me yet another sale. I don't know why. Bad news always come in emails. Being rejected by internships. Grades. Marked assignments. Bank account statements. The formality and the grim tone of emails put me on edge. Or maybe it's just PTSD.


In conclusion, I hate checking my emails.

(Pinterest)


P.S. I have 5 email accounts and I don't check any of them.


I love to carve my mind into words, to trace my heart on paper. Here, to type as my voice sings inside my head. Embarking on an adventure of self acceptance, self love, self improvement and soul searching. I wish to share it, the ups and downs. Perhaps I could inspire someone to finally start their overdue pilgrimage, or to be a friend to someone who is on the same hike. Expect personal stories, lessons learned, controversial opinions, fanfictions, honest reviews and emotional rants. You can call me Tortoise! FUN FACTS ABOUT ME: *Age:23 (still as confuse as ever!) *Zodiac sign:Cancer *Personality: INFP-T *Goodreads:https://www.goodreads.com/tortoiseteoh

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