Monologue: Wild Horse

(Pinterest)
Horses are one of my favourite living things.

(It's just a random monologue, don't read too much into it)


Someone once told me, I'm like a wild horse. I think I really am. I have no desire of being tamed and I can never imagine giving up my liberty to live in the stables. I cannot part with the innate need of freedom to explore, even the unknown nothingness. 


I know you don't mean to put a leash around my neck, yet I still feel your weight of needing and longing clinging on to me. A weighted blanket that was supposed to give me warmth but instead clamping me down by my own inner frantic. I know you loved me, but you can't love a wild horse even if it stayed put for you. It doesn't belong there, and things that don't belong dies, rotting from their souls. Love, once upon a time in full bloom, wilts. 


Sometimes I'm afraid to tell you I need to go even though I know you'll love me enough to understand. I'm scared you'll let me go too far and I'll forget how to love not being a wild horse again. A prideful animal, a selfish lover. I want you to miss me when I'm gone and believe that I love you even when I can't stay to show it. Surely, asking you to love someone that can't always be here and there is too great a favour to ask. 


I don't want to leave, I don't want you to let me go, but at the same time, I really do. This conflicted turmoil in my head. A wild horse. A conflicted beast.

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